From: kol14.com
To: Sandy Mcginnis
Date: Sat, 1 Nov 2008 14:58
Subject: Re: New position

> Dear Sir or Madam,
You can call me Sir, thank you.

 

> We would like to offer you a part time job on your computer.
Do I have to shut down my firewall and antivirus software first?

 

> Job Description:
> We send you the texts with important information for our employees
> with important information and you need correct the texts as an
> English-speaking person and then send back the revised text.
Is the important information that your employees with important information have really important information, because I only deal with information that is important information – plain old ordinary information I let the people interested in plain old ordinary information handle.

But yes. I can try to correct the texts as an English-speaking person, but since I’m a Swede I would prefer correcting them as a Swedish-speaking person pretending to know English.

 

> Salary:
> Please note that we don’t have a fixed salary for this vacancy. We
> will pay you $7.00 for every 1Kb of the corrected text. The salary is
> paid at the END of month. Every month your salary will vary depending
> on your activity.
Can’t you send the spam through Google translate yourselves? It’s way cheaper for you. The url, once again, is http://translate.google.com/ if my mail got lost among the spam in your inbox.

 

> Example: In case you correct about 5Kb of text a day, you will get
> over $1000.00 at the end of the month.
I think you meant to say kB, as in kilobytes. You are at best talking about 5 kilobits, and that’s only 1/8 of 5 kB. If you are going to send this e-mail to anyone else, please correct this before sending.

 

> Requirements:
> – Location: U.S.A.
No, not really. But since I adhere to the USA’s slogan of ”One nation to rule them all”, I guess I qualify anyway.

 

> – Age: 20+
Yes.

 

> – Ability to work at home
My ability to work from home is intact.

 

> – Computer skills (MS Word), personal e-mail address
I use OpenOffice, is that alright? My personal e-mail address you already have.

 

> – Responsibility
I crave it!

 

> If you are interested in this job, please, send the information
> mentioned below only to the following e-mail address:
> loveplanet.mccullough@gmail.com
Dear Sir/Madam Sandy Mcginnis, I’ll post my answer here instead, hoping your spambots will return to get it for you.

 

> FULL NAME:
You can call me Patrick Peterson.

 

> E-MAIL:
nobody@devnull.spamcop.net

 

> AGE:
20+, as required.

 

> OCCUPATION:
Head of technology, IronPort Systems Inc. Makers of spamcop.net.
Head of translation, Love Planet Union. Makers of spam.

 

> EDUCATION:
Script kiddie.

 

> AVAILABLE TIME TO WORK WITH US:
Until the end of spam.

 

> As soon as we receive your application, we will investigate it and
> contact you with more information within 24 hours.
Only contact me with information if it is important information. As stated above, plain old ordinary information I have no use for since I can’t sell it in bulk.

 

> Please, do not hesitate to contact us at e-mail: loveplanet.mccullough@gmail.com
> if you have any questions.
I will.

 

> Looking forwrd to your application.
> Best regards,
> Love Planet Union
> loveplanet.mccullough@gmail.com
All the best.